Stuff Brown People Like #8 – Stalking
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If you were to think that Cricket is India’s favorite past time, you would be wrong. India has a pastime even older than cricket and it’s called stalking. Brown people love to stalk. I guarantee you right now that if you are an even half-way decent looking girl, you are being stalked by 4 guys. As you are reading this, 3 of those guys are going through your Facebook picture while one is standing outside your window jerking off. Don’t believe me? Go look. I’ll wait right here……………….
Oh well, he must have heard you coming or else you would have heard him coming. But believe me, he was there. The sad truth is you can name at least 5 friends of yours that have been stalked in the past. Curry Bear himself has been stalked many times. Just by search results I get from Google, I can tell how many people are stalking me. I was stalked by girls even before I fell in a toxic waste dump and became Curry Bear. Yes, being stalked is not something that just happens to girls. Guys get stalked just as often, if not more so.
Sometimes a crazy ex-girlfriend will go on a different screen name and talk to you to see what you will say about her. Sometimes she will be on her friends screen name or e-mail you from another account. Often these girls will become friends with your friends and family members just so they can get into your inner circle. This is because she wants you in her inner circle, if you know what I mean.
Guy stalkers are less direct. They will follow you places, look up information about you and just observe you from a distance. Maybe even leave you notes, send you creepy e-mails or send flower to your dorm room on Valentine’s Day anonymously. The reason there are so many brown stalkers may have to do with Bollywood movies. You see, Bollywood is a world where these guys are not seen as stalkers, but secret admirers. I must admit, there was a time where I use to get off on the 6th floor of my dorm and walk two flight of stairs in hopes of running into Hima. Oh, Hima where have you gone?! You actually made me loose 4 lbs that semester, by taking the stairs. However, some people just take it way too far.
Brown people are into stalking like Canadians are into Hockey. I don’t know if every desi person deep down thinks they are Batman and want to sharpen their detective skills or if they were just inspired by Shah Rukh Khan’s acting in Darr. All I know is, you will never catch me singing about some crazy bitch name K-K-K-K-Kiran.
I’ve met many stalkers over the years. A lot of them I’ve met through study groups. I’m so glad I don’t have friends like these guys. It’s amazing what people will say to justify their stalking. Here are some lines I’ve heard from these guys, which puts them in the category of stalker:
“Dude she loves me man. She just doesn’t know it yet.”
“I’m going to the cafeteria. She’s about to get out of her Macro Economics class and get food from Taco Bell. If I time it right I’ll be right behind her in line.”
“She loves me so much..that her brain couldn’t handle it so it forced her to forget. That’s why i remind her every day.”
“I’m so not stalking her. I just follow her around and hope that she starts a conversation.”
I use to bump into this girl VERY often in the elevator. So i thought she was stalking me. So one day in the elevator i confronted her about it. It turns out, she thought i was stalking her, so we laughed about it and when back to her room and had sex. Yeah mad random. But afterwards we became friends and always talked about how we should do it in the elevator but never did, she was all talk. But yeah, neither of us were stalkers, just a weird coincident.
i love the picture. you always have the perfect pictures for each article.
i just vant to be her frand
Totally use to get stalked all the time….and when you confront them…she was like why you being conceited.
that picture is of inderjeet singh he was on to catch a predator.
So true!
I wish I had a stalker =(
“Oh well, he must have heard you coming or else you would have heard him coming.” haha so brash
My friend let me go through her facebook profile once cause I didn’t believe her when she said people were stalking her and sending her creepy messages and I almost wish I hadn’t seen it. There were at least 5 guys randomly messaging her, some left really creepy messages and went as far as wanting to meet up and stuff. I swear, one guy asked if he could be her husband or something. Sad to say that each and every one of them were brown.
Another of my female friends who was white said this one brown guy that was friends with me (that guy added me, he was just some vague friend of a friend I seen once that I put in my limited profile) sent her some real creepy messages. Damnit desi guys, stop being so damn creepy. It’s just giving us all a bad name
i am not going to lie… i totally stalk this hot ass guy on fb… i never tire of seeing his pics. if i need a pick me up… i know where to go…its really sad. but in my defense i used to know the kid… we just lost touch. but yeah totally go into stalker mode… he is just that hot!!
nandu you can stalk me anytime, day or night.
We stalk so we can love without getting pregnant.
I’ve been stalking a Desi guy for months … why isn’t he stalking me back?
He’s not that into you.
Oh, he is. He just doesn’t know it yet.
I made a fake profile on facebook as an experiment and the profile pic was a really hot girl… within one week i had over 100 messages and like 90% were brown guys creepin hard askin for cell numbers and were she lived.not to mention ther were like 200 pokes
Haven’t stalked for 4 years now.
Haven’t been stalked since 3 years.
Probably asked “Jeeb’s fake girl” out 2 years ago.
Got rejected a year ago.
Crap, now I gotta study for the HSC
your freakin fags only white people stalk people cause there gay!!!! losers racist pieces of shits. what are u guys kkk
i wish they had support groups for creepy desi stalkers like me….
I stalk many pussylicious brown mischi.