What to do Incase of an Attack.
The US government has a new website, http://www.ready.gov. It’s another attempt at scare mongering in the style of the old “duck and cover” advice after WWII.
The fun thing is that these pictures are so ambiguous, they could mean anything! Here are a few interpretations.
After exposure to radiation gang signs will be dope!
You can finally represent the upper middle west side!!
If you hear Punjabi MC on the radio, cower in the corner or run like hell.
In the middle of a terrorist attack, file cabinets will attack you.
Chemistry is Evil!
In time of war, Muslim fish will be our enemies.
If you choke yourself, you will see pretty colors.
When fish are exposed to radioactive chemicals, they will have the power to hypnotize you.
Be on the lookout for terrorists with pinkeye and chicken pox.
Do not drive a station wagon if a utility pole is protruding from the hood.
In case of an attack, use your emergency break. All will be right after that.
If your building collapses, climb under your table and give yourself a blowjob.
If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Lil’ Jon, yell What?!!.
That closet door in your bedroom leads to the gates of Hell. Don’t go there.
If you are trapped under falling debris, conserve oxygen by not passing gas.
SubZero is a terrorist. Finish Him!
If a door is closed, Judo chop it open.
If you are sprayed with an unknown substance, stand and think about it instead of seeing a doctor.
If Texas is attacked, don’t worry about it.
If radiation knocks on your door, do not answer. It’s a trap.
Electronic devices will enslave us all.
New club will open in NYC. ”Fall-Out Shelter”. Need to be 18 to get in: 21 to drink alcohol: radioactive to drink uranium.
After exposure you will grow really tall: watch your head.